Fiction, Humour, Writing

A Rich Blend.

A RLich Blend Image

This is a little piece I wrote in one of my creative writing classes. We were asked to set it in a coffee shop in an airport and experiment with dialogue.

I enjoyed the refuge that Camilo’s place provided. Refuge from the plague of tourists outside. Tourists documenting their lives with images. Images that lie. They’re just passing through.

Camilo welcomes me.

“Eh!!!… Mister Tourist!



Coffee for Mister Tourist!…

How are you this evening Mister Tourist?

How is your woman?

She is happy that you are out of the house.

Heh heh heh!

That reminds me of a good joke…

A woman walked into a joke shop…

She didn’t get anything!

Heh heh heh!

Do you like it?

What time is it?


You will want to eat too…


His lunch too!…

I apologize Mister Tourist!

She is getting old, slow, deaf and fat…

I will have to get blind to stay with her.

Heh heh heh.

One moment please.

I will get the coffee”

The coffee is good. It always is. Lorena makes it.

“Mister Tourist, tell me, why do you stay in this country?

Why not go home?

There is nothing here.

Do you stay for the women?

I don’t think so…

The women are ugly.

Look at Lorena…

Heh heh heh!

Do you stay for money?

This country has no money…

You can get more money at home.

I think I know why you stay.

You stay here because you run from home…

Is this it?

Are you a criminal at home?

They will put you in jail if you go home…

Heh heh heh.

This must be it.

There is no other reason.

Mister Criminal Tourist…

Heh heh heh!

They should make a movie about you Mister Criminal Tourist.

That will be the name of the movie…

Mister Criminal Tourist…

Heh heh heh!

Do you like it?

We can make it.

I will get my camera.

You can play the part of Mister Criminal Tourist.

Starring Mister Criminal Tourist,

As Mister Criminal Tourist,

In Mister Criminal Tourist…

Heh heh heh!

We will make millions and then we will both get out of this country…

To a country with loads of beautiful women…

Heh heh heh!

Do you like it?


Where is this man’s lunch?”

The food is good. It always is. Lorena must have been born in a kitchen.

“Mister Tourist.

Are you finished?

Are you leaving?

I will see you tomorrow if I don’t win the lotto.

Say hello to your beautiful woman for me.”

Now I’m sitting in a cafe in an airport. It’s bright. The coffee is burnt, overpriced and served with a smile. A smile that some man in a suit has scared onto this girls face. “Sandra” her name tag reads. Sandra burns my toasted sandwich and serves it to me with a smile. When I’m finished she overcharges me with a smile. She takes my money with a smile, she thanks me with a smile and she wishes me a nice day with a smile.

I pay for the memories, not the service.

26 thoughts on “A Rich Blend.

  1. Enjoyed this exercise. I could really hear this guy ribbing Mr Criminal Tourist. And it
    flowed. Nice. I’ll just say here too (sorry I’m on my phone) that I read the first chapter of your novel and would definitely keep reading if given the

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I liked this a lot! From top to bottom!
    Thanks for your attention to my blog. : )


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